Category Archives: Love

Love Don’t Cost a Thing

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Written by: Aleksandra Lyanskaya

Lets talk about love; whether it’s that lust feeling you acquired when you saw that someone walk across the room; whether it’s an infatuation you just can’t get over, no matter if the future entails being with that person or not; or whether it’s the real thing, love. We all experience this insightful and heartwarming and at times heartbreaking feeling of love. All of us have our own, different stories about how we fell in love with that someone we now have in our lives, or how we fell in love and lost that love over time. No matter what, love is a part of our heart we will never fully and truly lose or forget. Questions have come to how many people you can love at one time or how many people you can love throughout your lifetime. However, everyone will have their own opinion on this based on their life experiences and encounters. A first grader who has been in puppy-love may have an intriguing story about the day they met their soul mate on the swings the fist day of school and how the first day they held hands later on that year meant the world to them. A teenager who feels they have moved on from their childish days in life and is now fully ready for true love will tell a story about spending every minute of every day thinking of their loved one and how their future will look together as they scribble their name a million times on the back of their journal during math class. As a high schooler, love may be what is holding a pair of individuals together and while they try to choose a college near one another, no one can tell right away whether the distance will end up pulling them apart or closer together after all. As the college days fly by, studies are all we can focus on, but the thought of love isn’t forgotten. Yet, it is set aside, allowing lust and infatuation to hit the spot. Meeting all of these new faces on campus and feeling a push of adulthood on your back, it’s a question of whether you’ll be settling down for the first person you meet or it’s time to see all that is out there before the four years are over. With a blink of an eye, graduation day has come, caps are being thrown into the air, and a glass of champagne is being raised. We’re either left where we started, single and open to find a loved one for this bright future ahead of us, or leaving the college days behind and with that special someone who has been there and ready to move on in life with you. Love is interesting. We all have our points of view on it and it is ever changing. Each story holds a new spark and experience. It never ends and we never really want it to.

Where Are All The Bookworms?

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By Patrick James Quinn.

It’s a tale as old as time. The objectification of women as sex symbols or eye candy, told by society and the media to forego intelligence and values for skimpy clothes and a beguiling giggle.

Even in our debatably socially-advanced 21st century, it is rare to find a girl valued for her intellect above her appearance. Chart-topping artists such as Maroon 5, Kanye West and Kesha endlessly encourage women to submit, succumb, just party and have fun, don’t think or care, just do. Innumerable films (specifically of the action genre, such as the “James Bond” or “Bourne” series) switch out girls with each new installment, instilling the idea that women are as replaceable as the cars the leading men drive.

However, not all media is bad. Character such as Katniss Everdeen in “The Hunger Games” or Hermione Granger in the “Harry Potter” series, or artists like Taylor Swift, often depict strong, intelligent and purposeful women, giving young girls worthy role-models that they can look up to.

Why is it so difficult for a girl to be both intelligent and beautiful? Why must we put pressure on women to adhere to this perfect ideal that we’ve made up over time? “Everyone in Hollywood is so damn skinny and you constantly feel like you’re not skinny enough,” says Scarlett Johansson, a successful actress most recently seen in Marvel‘s “The Avengers“, “But I have ‘fat days’ and I accept that I’m never going to be rail thin. It’s hard not to feel pressure in this industry and I already use anti-aging products on my skin. I try not to let the pressure get to me but Los Angeles is a very hard place to be unless you have people here that love you. It can be very, very lonely, and it can eat you up if you don’t take care of yourself.” Even someone known for their beauty and sex-appeal still feels inadequate in the insatiable eyes of the public.

This article is equally a call for men to look beyond a girl’s appearance as it is about encouraging women to fight social pressure and find value in themselves, seeing their true beauty and self-worth instead of falling for a smooth line or dashing smile from someone tall, tan and handsome.

In our modern world of broken families, everyday abandonment, low self-esteem and mediocre role-models, a world where we are all looking for love and acceptance, it is difficult to truly be yourself and give worth to your identity. But security and self-worth are attractive, and it will draw the right people in, the kind of people who will see you for who you really are, build you up, and treat you the way you deserve to be treated.

To Be Monogamous or Not?

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Written by: Jill Heagerty

I’ve heard both sides: we’re biologically meant to mate with many partners and that monogamy does not work for humans, and that after the lust and falling in love stages there forms an attachment between partners that leaves their brains more satisfied than any previous stage. So which is it? Are we supposed to be with one person forever, or are we meant to have various partners to quench sexual appetites?

The argument for polygamy lies with the two facts concerning our genetic similarities to polygamous apes and the men in our species being taller than women. We are most closely related to chimpanzees and bonobos, naturally promiscuous mammals. Men in these species want to “spread their seed”, something men in our species also desire, so they mate with as many females as they can to produce maximum offspring. If our DNA resembles these primates, are we living by the wrong sexual rules? Are we only monogamous because culture demands it, and we’re actually going against our true nature? The other supporting evidence for polygamy is attributed to the height and weight differences between men and women. In both primate and non-primate species, the more disparity there is in the sizes between the genders, the more promiscuous the species is. On average, men are 10 percent taller and 20 percent heavier than women, suggesting that while humans are not meant to mate as much as chimpanzees or bonobos, we are not meant to be solely monogamous.

Monogamy’s side comes from the pleasure hormones released in the brain when we form deep attachments to one partner and the evolutionary benefit for raising children. There are three stages to long-term mating: lust, falling in love, and attachment. The first stage lust is caused by a general increase in estrogen and testosterone levels. Falling in love releases specific neurotransmitters in the brain associated with pleasure, including pheromones, dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin. These hormones act similarly to amphetamines, giving us intense feelings of excitement. The last stage is attachment, releasing oxytocin and vasopressin in the brain, giving a constant satisfaction that the other pleasure inducing hormones don’t. It’s not possible for humans to be high on love all the time, so the body gives pleasure that can endure. The purpose of oxytocin and vasopressin is to keep families together, an evolutionary benefit to children in today’s society. In the beginning of time it was okay for males to have multiple mates because children were raised in tight knit communities, but with single families there needs to be two partners providing support for children to flourish.

There is no clear cut answer. Whether we are monogamous or polygamous lies in individual needs, as there are arguments to support both sides. The question becomes, do you want the crazy rush of passion associated with having many partners for life or do you want the quiet satisfaction of having one person to drive you crazy?

Taking your time, might be time well spent.

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By: Stacy Liberatore

As little girls we are read stories of damsels in distress waiting for their knight in shining armor to ride in and save them on their white horse. We grow up playing dress up and pretending that we are the pretty, pretty princess.

Then we get older and realize that it all happened once upon a time in a land far-far away. Yet, that idea still sits on the back burner of our thoughts. We believe the idea that Mr. Right does exist and he has to be out there somewhere waiting for us to just cross his path or him cross ours.

 Waiting, instead of perusing, might be the road worth traveling. Most of us have had front row seats to the dating game, the place where the saying “on to the next” has become words to live by. Then you reach the point where you just settle for someone who you know isn’t right for you. But he might have a nice smile and he may open the door and pick up the check. Which are all good qualities, but he doesn’t give you that over the park home run feeling.

Everyone wants that fairytale romance and the sooner is always better.  But instead of using all your energy on finding a man, use this time to find yourself.  Do what you enjoy the most; Take up a new hobby or spend more time with friends.

The more you learn about yourself before taking the leap into a committed relationship, the more successful that relationship will be in the future. The less time you spend on” operation find the right man”, the more you might just find out about yourself and life.  In reality no one was ever been upset that they took their time when it came to finding Mr. Right. Only do we get upset and frustrated with lovers and ourselves is when you rush into things.

Sometimes we are so anxious to find Mr. Right that we lose ourselves in the process.  He is out there and he will always be out there, however you need to find yourself before you find him.  Going from man to man hoping this one might be different will only leave you more and more disappointed.

Try avoiding those who you think are the one for you and go with your heart; wait for the one who you know is the one right for you. This is the time when you need to tell your brain to take the bench and let your heart take the lead.

Sexercise Your Way to Love and Happiness

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Written by: Kathleen Mulvihill

Let’s face it, many of us don’t place enough value on the importance of healthy and loving sex. Sure we try to keep our love relationships sex-intensive early on, but as time progresses, love and sex too often become out-of-shape, second-class citizens in the bedroom.

Libido tips from the lips of Sigmund Freud, Masters and Johnson and Dr. Ruth have been shared throughout the decades, but if you’re looking for a truly practical and sex-sational way to take your love life from fizzle to sizzle, check out one of the newest trends in the world of fitness – sexercise classes. The classes are largely for women, but the guys certainly benefit from these sexy workouts. Gentlemen: think trickle-down sensuality.

Sexercise classes, now offered in many locations throughout the United States, are a healthy way for women to connect with their pelvis (their sexual core), through a series of fun bump-and-grind kind of movements. The proposed end result is a happier love life through improved sexual stimulation for yourself as well as your partner.

If you’re not quite the super-toned exhibitionist you see in those classes, but you madly want that loving feeling back, take heart. You can practice your own form of sexercise in the privacy of your bedroom. Those adages, use or lose it, and practice makes perfect, couldn’t be more true here. In plain language, here are some tips from a variety of experts in love and sexuality:

  • Just do it.  Even if you’re not up to hamster speed, sometimes you just need to get back on the old treadmill and give it a whirl. Slow and steady wins the race.
  • Initiate. Ladies, this goes for you especially. Too often, the guys have to play Tarzan while Jane goes out on a limb to stay aloof. Take him by surprise, tickle his fancy and watch that caveman drop his remote and evolve.
  • Sex toys. Sometimes it takes a good energizer battery to spice things up. Work it, girls!
  • Burn it up. The more vigorous the sex, the more calories you burn. On average, a half-hour of lovemaking burns a minimum of 85 calories. That may not sound like much, but it beats vacuuming and adds up during the intercourse of a week. Fun too. Check out Dr. Robert S. Wieder’s study of calories burned during sexual activity published in the American Journal of Exercise Calorimetry in August 2006.

So get in touch with your inner muscles, get that thump back in your heart and reinvigorate your fitness workouts by adding a regular routine of sex. That loving feeling is great for happiness.

How to Improve your Relationship

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Written by Lisa Pearson

With the advent of a new year rapidly approaching, many people are thinking about making resolutions for the new year. If you are single, maybe you have decided that you no longer want to casually date and want to be in a relationship. If you are in a relationship, perhaps you would like to make some changes to improve your relationship. Whatever the situation, the following tips can help you to make some improvements in your current status.

If you are single:

Girl on a bad date with guyLooking for love in the wrong places?

Relationship expert Marcia Brandwynne states that “Many single people spend a lot of time and energy searching for Mr. or Ms. Right … but don’t have a clue about the type of person they should really be looking for.” Passionately seeking someone without knowing who to look for makes the search for a partner that much more difficult. Surely you have some ideal traits and characteristics in mind; you just have to think about it.

Brandwynne suggests that the secret to finding a compatible partner is to meet someone who holds similar ideals and morals as yourself. The first step towards finding a mate is to think about and write down your own ideals and morals. Think about what is important to you, what interests you, and what kind of life you want. Get to know yourself better to get a better idea of what type of person would suit you best. After you do some soul searching and taking inventory of your life, you are ready to search for your ideal mate.

If you are in a relationship:

Do you find your relationship to be full of arguments and you feel the love is gone? Did you know that fighting the right way can actually help and improve your relationship? Brandwynne suggests that couples who complain and explain to turn ugly fights into constructive conversations. Expressing your problem with your partner and then explaining how it affects you will allow them to see things from your perspective. Yelling and attacking your partner gets you nowhere fast; the other person can shut down or it can turn into a long shouting match with nothing getting resolved.

Couple talking out an argument

Complain and explain

Brandwynne also recommends that you be aware of your body language while you’re having these conversations as well. If you are crossing your arms or rolling your eyes, your partner will likely get defensive and offended by these actions. Remember to complain and explain and improve your relationship.

 

Sweet Chocolate Valentine’s Giveaway

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Watches on Net Makes Valentine's Day Sweeter

 

If you’re in the mood for a mouthwatering deal this Valentine’s Day, Watches on Net is ready to accommodate.  The mens watches site that offers the most stylish designer timepieces is sweetening their pot with free gifts.  Choose from the many luxury men’s and women’s watches that they feature and walk away with an extra added bonus.  

Purchase one of their exceptional timepieces between January 21st and February 7th 2011 and receive not one, but three additional Valentine’s Day gifts.  Watches on Net will take the hassle out of shopping this year.  Just make your selection from the thousands of luxurious watches and Watches on Net will offer you complimentary gift wrapping, as well as a free Valentine’s Day gift card.  If that isn’t enough to tempt you, they will also throw in a mouthwatering box of assorted chocolates, absolutely free! 

Watches on Net features the widest variety of men’s and women’s timepieces on the internet, and shopping with them is safe and convenient.  If you are in a quandary over what to get your sweetie this Valentine’s Day…visit Watches on net.  

At the touch of your finger you will find the perfect watch, have it hand wrapped, and delivered with a delicious box of chocolates.  It doesn’t make sense to shop anywhere else.